1. Can't you just check your friends list? But yeh I get what you mean - system can get a bit spammy when you are fighting/looting etc. Just not sure where friend logins would go - guild/union logins could go in guild chat, but friends not sure other than system. I will look into moving them back to the main chat window I suppose.
2. Ah yes, that wasn't supposed to get into the game. I was creating a bad word filter to be used for character creation, name change, guild name, pet name etc. etc. and was testing it with the chat sytem as it was easier for me, and forgot to disable it. The only word in there is the f word. I would like to add a chat profanity filter that you can turn on and off and it would indeed be as you suggest, using * to hide the words.
3. It's on my todo and I will look at it when I return from travels.
4. Yeh I just can't find what is causing it. It happens completely randomly with no apparent trigger. I checked the client from before I updated the chat system and it had the same problems so I can't even find the cause from comparing what I changed unfortunately. But still looking anyway.